HANDLING CONFLICT

Definition of terms.
Conflict resolution is conceptualized as the methods and processes involved in facilitating the peaceful ending of conflict. Often, committed group members attempt to resolve group conflicts by actively communicating information about their conflicting motives or ideologies to the rest of the group (e.g., intentions; reasons for holding certain beliefs), and by engaging in collective negotiation.[1] Ultimately, a wide range of methods and procedures for addressing conflict exist, including but not limited to, negotiation, mediation, diplomacy, and creative peace building.
Conflict is to come into collision or disagreement; be contradictory, at variance, or in opposition; clash: The account of one eyewitness conflicted with that of the other. My class conflicts with my going to the concert; sometimes conflict is said as to fight or contend; do battle or struggle, especially a prolonged struggle; strife.
 Also conflict is said to be a controversy; quarrel between two or more parties, a discord of action, feeling, or effect; antagonism or opposition, as of interests or principles, a striking together; collision.Sometimes is said as anincompatibility or interference, as of one idea, desire, event, or activity with another.
The term conflict resolution may also be used interchangeably with dispute resolution, where arbitration and litigation processes are critically involved. Furthermore, the concept of conflict resolution can be thought to encompass the use of nonviolent resistance measures by conflicted parties in an attempt to promote effective resolution.
 For examples of large-scale civil resistance campaigns, see Civil Resistance and Power Politics: The Experience of Non-violent Action from Gandhi to the Present. [2] Conflict resolution as an academic field is relatively new. George Mason University in Fairfax, VA was the first university to offer a PhD programonflict management refers to the long-term management of intractable conflicts. It is the label for the variety of ways by which people handle grievances—standing up for what they consider to be right and against what they consider to be wrong. Those ways include such diverse phenomena as gossip, ridicule, lynching, terrorism, warfare, feuding, genocide, law, mediation, and avoidance.[citation needed] Which forms of conflict management will be used in any given situation can be somewhat predicted and explained by the social structure—or social geometry—of the case. Conflict is a state of opposition between ideas, interests, disagreement or controversy, a clash, as between two appointments made for the same time. Conflict might be psychol opposition between two simultaneous but incompatible wishes or drives, sometimes leading to a state of emotional tension and thought to be responsible for neuroses, a struggle or clash between opposing forces; battle
When angry, separate yourself
If from the situation and
Take time to cool out.
Attack the problem, not the person. Start with a compliment a problem with Samuel, then maybe Joe is the problem. Is conflict a frequent part of many ofyour relationships? Perhaps it’s time to take alook in the mirror and see if your actions orattitudes are the cause of the recurring conflict.
7. Don’t overreact.
When conflict arises, it’s important to keep it in perspective and react appropriately. How big ofan issue is it, really? Does your reaction match it in intensity? If not, then you might be responding to an underlying issue or something from your past. I believe that when my response is more intense than the issue at hand, then my response is often about something else. That’s something I need to resolve with myself.
8. Don’t become defensive.
Contrary to how it makes us feel, most conflict is not directly about us. Instead, it’s a problem to be solved by two or more people. Avoid the blame game, and you’ll have a clearer head for approaching the problem logically.
9. Welcome the conflict.
In spite of our best efforts, we will all have conflict with other people, because they’re not just like us. They have different personalities, beliefs, and desires, so there will be disagreements andmisunderstandings. Rather than running from conflict, or reacting with horror when it comes up, focus on resolving it together and making it a learning experience. It’s been said that conflict can give you either ulcers or understanding.
10. Take a risk.
This is the hardest part. When faced with the potential for conflict, we may be tempted to disconnect and distrust. We think that will avoid pain. But the reality is that everyone in relationship gets hurt. I made the decision a long time ago that I would rather risk being hurt than keep people at a distance. So I choose every day to be vulnerable with others, to believe the best about them, and trust them.
Conflict is an inevitable part of life. And these Ten Commandments aren’t all that can be said about handling it. But following them will help you approach conflict in a healthy and constructive way, setting the stage to work together to find a resolution that allows both of you to win.

   Business
    Business Management
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    Importance of Solving Workplace Conflict
Importance of Solving Workplace Conflict
By Arnold Anderson, eHow Contributor
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Workplace conflict can have several damaging effects.
Workplace conflict can begin between two individuals, but if it is not dealt with immediately then it can erupt into an office-wide problem. The efficient way to deal with workplace conflict is to immediately attempt a cooperative resolution before it gets out of hand, according to the University of Colorado at Boulder Student Affairs website. Every employer needs to recognize the importance of solving workplace conflict and have policies in place to address the situation.
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    Types of Conflict in the Workplace
    Definition of Conflict in the Workplace
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    Employee Attendance
        Workplace conflict can add stress to your staff that can result in short and long-term employee attendance issues, according to the Centre for Conflict Resolution website. The short-term effects include repeated work absences that can have a negative effect on productivity. The company is also forced to absorb the costs of unscheduled absences, which can include hiring a temporary replacement and an increase in damaged or low-quality products. The long-term effects of stress due to workplace conflict can be health issues that would not only cost your company money in disability payments, but also prevent valued employees from being able to do their jobs.
    Collaboration
        One of the strengths of having a workforce is that multiple points of view can create multiple options when dealing with company issues, according to the Mind Tools website. When there is conflict working its way through the workplace, that sense of collaboration starts to fall away, and the good ideas that kept your company ahead of the competition start to diminish. Solving conflict keeps the ideas flowing and helps your company to develop efficient ways to address the issues in the marketplace.
    Retention
        If your company is inefficient at dealing with workplace conflict, then the tense workplace atmosphere that creates will make it difficult to retain good employees. When employees are forced to attend to conflict that is counter-productive, they begin to develop a negative view of the company. Not only does it interfere with your ability to retain employees, but it also prevents your current employees from referring qualified people to work for your company.
    Lawsuits
        Conflict, when left unresolved, can escalate into issues that will lead to lawsuits. One party that feels harassed may decide to sue the harassing employee and the company. Prolonged conflict can also result in incidents of workplace violence, according to the Centre for Conflict Resolution website. If your company does not work to prevent workplace conflict, then the company can be to blame for the violence that results. That could lead to having to settle on expensive lawsuits from employees who were victims of workplace violence.The Cost of Conflict
Conflict is defined as a difference of wants, needs, or expectations. The workplace is filled with people who have differences of wants, needs, and expectations. So, of course, conflicts will occur. These conflicts can be an asset to the organization. They may be opportunities for creativity, collaboration, and improvement.
But conflict can also be costly to an organization. The trouble isn't necessarily the fact that conflict exists. It's how we deal with those conflicts or what happens when they aren't resolved. The impact of conflict in the workplace can be devastating - to the parties involved, to colleagues and teams, to clients, and to the business as a whole. Some of the results of unresolved conflict in the workplace include:
 Stress, frustration, and anxiety
    Loss of sleep
    Strained relationships
    Grievances and litigation
Presenteeism
    Employee turnover
    Loss of productivity
    Increased client complaints
    Absenteeism
    Sabotage
    Injury and accidents
    Disability claims
    Sick leave
symptoms of unresolved conflict are a significant cost factor in organizations. Take a look at some of the facts and figures below. How much is conflict costing your organization?
Mental Health / Stress
"Unresolved conflict represents the largest reducible cost in many businesses, yet it remains largely unrecognized." (Dana, Daniel (1999). Measuring the Financial Cost of Organizational Conflict. MTI Publications and Slaikev, K. and Hasson, R. (1998). Controlling the Cost of Conflict. Jossey-Bass)
"Employees in high pressure/low control situations or high effort/low reward situations have much greater risks to their physical and mental well being. (Tangri, Ravi, Stress Costs - Stress Cures: How to recover productivity lost to stress, 2003.)
"The number of employees seeking help for work-related conflict has increased from 23 percent in 1999 to close to 30 percent in 2001." (WarrenShepel, Workplace Trends Linked to Mental Health Crisis in Canada, 2002)
A 2005 UK survey by Roffey Park found that "78% of managers are suffering from work-related stress, 52% have experienced harassment, 46% have seen an increase in conflict at work." (Roffey Park [online], Failure to manage change heightens stress, harassment and conflict at work, survey reveals, Jan. 05)
"The total value of lost work time due to stress is estimated to be $1.7 billion. (WarrenShepel [online], Health & Wellness Research Database, 2005)
"Employees who rate their managers as "sensitive" miss an estimated 3.7 days of work, wheras employees whose managers are rates as "non-sensitive" miss approximately 6.2 days of work. (MacBriade-King, J.L., and Bachmann, K. Solutions for the stressed-out worker. The Conference Board of Canada,1999)
An estimated 16% of employees feel that poor interpersonal relations are a source of stress at work. (WarrenShepel [online],Health& Wellness Research Database, 2005)
Grievances/Litigation
"The number of employees seeking help for harassment has almost tripled from 1999 to 2001." (WarrenShepel [online], Health & Wellness Research Database, 2005)
"The math isn't complicated. A complaint that escalates to a lawsuit can easily cost $50 000 to $100 000 and take three to five years to settle. It doesn't stop there. (Taylor, Robin,Workplace tiffs boosting demand for mediators. National Post Mar. 17/03)
"In the case of harassment, the number of employees seeking help almost tripled between 1999 and 2001. Add absenteeism, employee theft, sabotage, not to mention the cost of employee turnover (estimated to be as much as 75% to 150% of base salary) and it is understandable why companies are paying attention."(Taylor, Robin,Workplace tiffs boosting demand for mediators. National Post Mar. 17/03)
A 2005 UK survey of managers by Roffey Park found that "52% have experienced harassment." (Roffey Park [online], Failure to manage change heightens stress, harassment and conflict at work, survey reveals, Jan. 05)
"Sexual harassment is associated with more conflict in work teams, less cohesion and less success in meeting financial goals, " (Kleiman, Carol, Harrassment bad for bottom line, study finds. The Ottawa Citizen: Wednesday Sept. 7/05)
"According to a nationwide study, the average jury verdict in wrongful termination cases is over $600 00 and companies lose 64% of the cases." (Bureau of National Affairs, Without Just Cause: An Employer's Practical Guide on Wrongful Discharge, 1998)
In the United States an average of 2 years are required for the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission to investigate most claims. (Busch, R II, The Conundrum: Conflict - The Solution: Designing Effective Conflict Management Systems, 16 Preventative L. Rep. 1997)
"Corporations that have developed collaborative conflict management systems report significant litigation cost savings: Brown and Root reported and 80% reduction in outside litigation costs, Motorola reported a 75% reduction over a period of six years, NCR reported a 50% reduction and a drop of pending lawsuits from 263 in 1984 to 28 in 1993" (Ford, John, Workplace Conflict: Facts and Figures, [online] Mediate.com website, July 2000)
Presenteeism
"Another set of problems may occur when employees with high intent to turnover do not leave the organization. Such employees tend to have lower commitment, be more dissatisfied with their jobs and reduce morale in the area in which they work. Many such employees" retire on the job" (ie. Do not do their share of the work) which causes workload problems for others in their area." (Duxbury & Higgins, Work-Life Conflict in Canada in the New Millenium: A status Report, 2003]
"The rate of 'presenteesim' is estimated to be as much as three time higher than absenteeism."(WarrenShepel [online], Health & Wellness Research Database, 2005)
Employee loss / turnover
"Chronic unresolved conflict acts as a decisive factor in at least 50% of departures. Conflict accounts for up to 90% of involuntary departures, with the possible exception of staff reductions due to downsizing and restructuring." (Dana, Dan, [online] The Dana Measure of Financial Cost of Organizational Conflict, 2001)
"No matter what the cause, turnover has a number of undesirable implications for organizations, including the costs of losing an experienced worker, recruiting and retraining a successor (retraining is estimated to cost 1.5 times the employee's annual salary), the lower productivity of a new worker, and secondary morale effects on managers, peers and subordinates." (Duxbury & Higgins, Work-Life Conflict in Canada in the New Millenium: A status Report, 2003)
The turnover costs for an employee is anywhere between 75% and 150% of the annual salary. (Phillips, D.T. The Price Tag of Turnover. Personnel Journal, Dec. 1990, at p 58, 1990)
"A team-member's commitment to the team and the team mission can decrease if intra-team conflict remains unresolved. ...if unhealthy conflict goes unresolved for too long, team members are likely to leave the company or use valuable time to search for alternatives." (Barnes-Slater, Synthia and Ford, John,[online] MGH Consulting,Measuring Conflict: Both The Hidden Costs and the Benefits of Cofnlict Management Interventions, LawMemo.com, 2005)
Loss of Productivity/Wasted Time
"Tension and stress reduce motivation and disturb concentration. A loss of simple productivity of 25% (doing things other than work related activities, such as discussing the dispute, playing computer games, finding reasons to get out of the area) reduces an average work week to fewer than 20 hours...)" (Cram, James A. and MacWilliams, Richard K.[online] The Cost of Conflict in the Workplace, Cramby River Consultants, date unknown)
42% of a Manager's Time is spent addressing conflict in the workplace. (Watson, C & Hoffman, R, Managers as Negotiators, Leadership Quarterly 7(1), 1996)
"I've had CEOs and senior vice presidents tell me they can spend up to 70% of their time on conflict..." (Taylor, Robin,Workplace tiffs boosting demand for mediators. National Post Mar. 17/03)
"Fortune 500 Senior Executives spend 20% of their time in litigation related activities." (Levine, Stewart, The Many Costs of Conflict, Mediate.com website, 1998)
"Over 65% of performance problems result from strained relationships between employees, not from deficits in individual employee's skill or motivation." (Dana, Dan, [online] The Dana Measure of Financial Cost of Organizational Conflict, 2001)
Up to 30% of a typical managers time is spent dealing with conflict. (Thomas, K and Schmidt, W. A survey of managerial interests with respect to conflict. Academy of Management Journal, June 1976.)
A 1996 study demonstrated that 42% of a manager's time is spent on conflict related negotiations. (Watson, C and Hoffman, R, Managers as Negotiators, Leadership Quarterly 7 (1) 1996.)
Absenteeism
In a study of 50 000 Canadian employees nationwide Health Canada found that "the greater the number of sources of stress reported in the social environment at work, the greater the likelihood of reporting more than 10 days off as a result of ill health."(Health Canada, Workplace Health System, no.3, 1998)
"Employees who report the following sources of stress are more likely than others to be absent for six or more days...interpersonal relations; job control; and management practices" (Health Canada, Canadian Fitness and Lifestyle Research Institute. Workplace Health System, no.3.1998)
The cost of employee absence alone [in Canada] is approximately $8.6 billion. (The Health Communication Unit [online], The Case for Comprehensive Workplace health Promotion: Making "Cents" of a Good Idea, date unknown)
Other consequences of increased conflict-related stresses include greater incidence of substance abuse, heart problems, back problems, cancers, mental health problems, greater incidence of workplace injury and much higher incidence of interpersonal conflict. (Health Canada, Best Advice on Stress Risk Management in the Workplace, 2000).
"Bullied employees take, on average, seven days per year more sick leave than others." (Knight, Julian, Bullied workers suffer 'battle stress". BBC News Online, Tuesday Aug. 04)
Sabotage
"Studies reveal a direct correlation between prevalence of employee conflict and the amount of damage and theft of inventory and equipment. And, covert sabotage of work processes and of management's efforts usually occurs when employees are angry at their employer." (Dana, Dan, [online] The Dana Measure of Financial Cost of Organizational Conflict, 2001)
Physical Injury / Accidents
"There is increasing evidence that psychosocial factors relating to the job and work environment play a role in the development of work-related musculoskeletal disorder of the upper extremity and back." (Musculoskeletal Disorders and Workplace Factors: A Critical Review of Epidemiologic Evidence for Work-Related musculoskeletal Disorders of the Neck, Upper Extremity, and Low Back, National Institute of Occupational Safety and Health, July 1992)
"It is accepted and proven that errors lead to accidents and that stress can lead to errors. It follows logically, therefore, that stress must also contribute to accident causation." (Nguyen, Lieu, Bibbings, Roger, Exploring the links between stress and accidents in the workplace: a literature review. Journal of the Institution of Occupational Safety and Health, Vol. 6(2) December 2002 p.9-20)
Disability Costs
"...depression and high stress were found to have the greatest impact on worker health care costs., increasing these costs more than obesity, smoking or high blood pressure. In fact, these cost were 46% higher for workers who felt they were under a lot of stress." (The Health Communication Unit [online], The Case for Comprehensive Workplace health Promotion: Making "Cents" of a Good Idea, date unknown.)
"Workplace stress and work-related conflict are among the top eight reasons why employees request counseling assistance." (Warren Shepel, Workplace Trends Linked to Mental Health Crisis in Canada, 2002)
"Job stress is a key driver of health care costs. According to the Journal of Occupational Environmental Medicine, health care expenditures are nearly 50 percent greater for workers reporting high levels of stress."(Corbitt Clark, Mary, [online], The Cost of Job Stress, mediate.com)
Workplace Violence / Bullying
"There is a drastic increase in the severity of work-related issues with workplace violence and work-related conflict contributing the greatest increases." (Warren Shepel, Workplace Trends Linked to Mental Health Crisis in Canada, 2002)
"Dr. Tehrani conducted a study of 165 professionals in the caring sector such as nurses and social workers. Dr. Tehrani found that 36% of the men and 42% of the women reported having experienced bullying."(Knight, Julian, Bullied workers suffer 'battle stress". BBC News Online, Tuesday Aug. 04)
Community/Family Harm
"Conflict is a good example of how harm can be produced in the workplace and of how this harm "spills over" into families and communities." Such harm includes both inner-directed harm (suicidal behavior, recklessness, agitated depression and abuse of alcohol, drugs) and outer-directed expressions (threatening behaviour, emotional and/or verbal abuse, bullying, harassment, assault, domestic violence, road rage). (Health Canada, Best Advice on Stress Risk Management in the Workplace, 2000, pp 15-16.)Effects of conflict
The result of conflict is not always negative; it gives a positive effect as well.
Positive effect
A conflict gives positive effects if it is handled constructively. They are:
· Positive change in the society
· Opportunity for newer possibilities
· Renewal in relationships
· Increase in productivity of all sectors
These effects of conflict will bring positive change that will aid in the development of the society.
Negative effect
The effects of conflict will be negative if proper conflict management is not done. The negative effects are:
· Increase in stress in people
· Decrease in production
Participation for Social Harmony (UJYALO) Program 3
· Degradation in relationships and worsening cooperation.
· Restricted areas increase
· Increase in the possibilities of violent conflict
These negative effects of conflict can lead to disintegration. So, importance must begiven to timely interventions to resolve conflict.
References;
Augsburger, D. (1992). Conflict mediation across cultures. Louisville, Kentucky: Westminster / John Knox Press.
Bannon, I. & Paul Collier (Eds.). (2003). Natural resources and violent conflict: Options and actions. Washington, D.C: The World Bank.
Ury, F. & Rodger Fisher. (1981). Getting to yes: Negotiating agreement without giving in. New York, NY: Penguin Group.
Wilmot,W. &JouyceHocker. (2007). Interpersonal conflict. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill Companies.
Bercovitch, Jacob and Jackson, Richard. 2009. Conflict Resolution in the Twenty-first Century: Principles, Methods, and Approaches. University of Michigan Press, Ann Arbor.
de Waal, Frans B. M. and Angeline van Roosmalen. 1979. Reconciliation and consolation among chimpanzees. Behavioral Ecology and Sociobiology 5: 55–66. de Waal, Frans B. M. 1989. Peacemaking Among Primates. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA.
    Judge, Peter G. and Frans B. M. de Waal. 1993. Conflict avoidance among rhesus monkeys: coping with short-term crowding. Animal Behaviour 46: 221–232
Veenema, Hans et al. 1994. Methodological improvements for the study of reconciliation. Behavioural Processes 31:29–38. de Waal, Frans B. M. and FilippoAureli. 1996. Consolation, reconciliation, and a possible cognitive difference between macaques and chimpanzees. Reaching into thought: The minds of the great apes (Eds. Anne E. Russon, Kim A. Bard, Sue Taylor Parker), Cambridge University Press, New York, NY: 80–110.Aureli, Filippo. 1997. Post-conflict anxiety in non-human primates: the mediating role of emotion in conflict resolution. Aggressive Behavior 23: 315–328.
    Castles, Duncan L. and Andrew Whiten. 1998. Post-conflict behaviour of wild olive baboons, I. Reconciliation, redirection, and consolation. Ethology 104: 126–147.
    Hicks, Donna. 2011. Dignity: The Essential Role It Plays in Resolving Conflict. Yale University Press
    Silk, Joan B. 2002. The form and function of reconciliation in primates. Annual Review of Anthropology 31: 21–44.
    Weaver, Ann and Frans B. M. de Waal. 2003. The mother-offspring relationship as a template in social development: reconciliation in captive brown capuchins (Cebusapella). Journal of Comparative Psychology 117: 101–110. Palagi, Elisabetta et al. 2004. Reconciliation and consolation in captive bonobos (Pan paniscus). American Journal of Primatology 62: 15–30.Palagi, Elisabetta et al. 2005. Aggression and reconciliation in two captive groups of Lemur catta. International Journal of Primatology 26: 279–294. Lorenzen, Michael. 2006. Conflict Resolution and Academic Library Instruction. LOEX Quarterly 33, no. ½,: 6–9, 11.Winslade, John & Monk, Gerald. 2000. Narrative Mediation: A New Approach to Conflict Resolution. Jossey-Bass Publishers, San Francisco.Bar-Siman-Tov, Yaacov (Ed.) (2004). From Conflict Resolution to Reconciliation. Oxford University Press Tesler, Pauline. 2001, 2008. Collaborative Law: Achieving Effective Resolution in Divorce without Litigation (American Bar Association).Tesler, Pauline and Thompson, Peggy. 2006. Collaborative Divorce: TheKellett, Peter M. (2007). Conflict Dialogue. London: Sage Publications. ISBN 1-4129-0930-91.aThe word conflict comes from Latin conflictus, which means toconflÄ«gere to combat, from flÄ«gere to strike.
Conflict is a state of opposition between ideas, interests, etc; disagreement or controversy, a clash, as between two appointments made for the same time. Conflict might be psychol opposition between two simultaneous but incompatible wishes or drives, sometimes leading to a state of emotional tension and thought to be responsible for neuroses, astruggle or clash between opposing forces; battle
When angry, separate yourself, lf from the situation andtake time to cool out.
•Attack the problem, not the person. Start with a compliment.
•Do not review the situationas a competition, where onehas to win and one has tolose. Work toward a solution where bothparties can have some of their needs me. Focus on areas of common interestand agreement, instead of areas ofdisagreement and opposition.

NEVER jump to conclusions ormake assumptions about what another is feeling orthinking.
Listen without interrupting; ask for feedback if needed to assure a clearunderstanding of the issue.Remember, when only one person’s needs are satisfied ina conflict, it is NOTresolved and will continue.
Forget the past and stay in the present.
Build ‘power with’ NOT‘power over’ others.Thank the personfor listening.